There are many reasons, that for some, losing a dog can be more difficult than losing a human family member or friend.
My Constant Companion
Often, we spend more time with and give more attention to our dog than anyone else. They make us laugh, comfort us when we are sad and provide constant companionship when we let them.
They offer us their unconditional love and acceptance, and sometimes, they are the only being who seems to do so. Their lack of judgment is hard to come by in the human world.
“I have found that when you are deeply troubled, there are things you get from the silent devoted companionship of a dog that you can get from no other source.”
― Doris Day
That is so true!
Our dogs are completely dependent on us for their care. In essence, we are responsible for their survival, and therefore to some extent, unfortunately, their death. We are the decision makers when it comes to their care and well-being, so the circumstances surrounding the death adds an additional depth to the bond we share and further layers of emotion.
While we absolutely communicate with our dogs, it has its limits; we can be left wondering if they knew how much we loved them or if we made the right decisions for their care. When a close relative or friend is sick or dying, we may be able to speak the previously unspoken apology or assure each other of love. While we know in our hearts our dogs offered unconditional love, the sadness that envelops us when they die can prevent us from feeling this as truth.
Our daily routines become completely disrupted. We can be left with no longer having a sense of purpose, particularly if we don’t have any other animals, 2-legged children or spouse to come home to and care for. For many, their dog is the first being they attend to upon waking and the last upon day’s end. Therefore, there are constant reminders that our dog is no longer with us, and what we focus upon is responsible for our feelings.
Our dogs often provide us with an identity. How many dog parents know all the dogs’ names in the neighborhood, but not necessarily all the guardians’? It can be very lonely to walk the neighborhood after one’s dog has passed, only to no longer be recognizable to those you thought you ‘knew’. Our dogs gave us the means to connect, and without that, life can lose some of its luster and much of its joy.
It’s likely I haven’t even touched upon all the reasons losing our dog can be so difficult. Please add to this list in the comments below.
I am so grateful that I found this site. I lost my 16 lab 9 weeks ago and I am having a very hard time getting on. I work full time from home but I am so use to having my furbaby, I have no reason to go outside now unless my hubby makes me. Just to think of her makes me cry.
Oh Lori, I’m so sorry. It’s just so hard to lose our dogs, isn’t it?? Let me give you some reasons to go outside:
~it’s one of (or maybe the top) your dog’s favorite places to be, so her spirit will definitely join you out there (look for signs!);
~getting fresh air is one of the best things you can do for yourself; go out and take in some long, slow deep breaths and feel the sun (even the rain!) on your face;
~the converse, staying indoors, holds on to sad, negative energy. Even if going outside feels sad without your dog, the sadness will have a chance to dissipate better, or in other words, more likely to release, even a little at a time helps!
my dog passed away yesterday and my heart is shattered .. i open a cabinet and her food is there ..i open the fridge food there ..dishwasher bowls in there .. everywhere i turn all i can do is remember that she is gone ..she really was my furry bestfriend
Aw Angel, I’m so sorry. Yes, I understand your heart is shattered… it’s so hard to lose our best friends, and dogs are the best for sure. Whether you put away (or donate, throw away, whatever) your dog’s things now or later is up to you of course, and everyone’s decision is individual. I put away some of Ace’s things, his bowls, his 2nd bed on the floor (because usually he slept with me) right away. But I’ve hung on to his collar and some of his favorite toys still two years later, and I’ll probably always keep them. They now hold more loving memories than pain fortunately. Give yourself time to grieve, but also do your best to focus on the gratitude you must have that she was in your life for the time she was and all the wonderful things she brought into your life. Her spirit is near you still; ask her for a sign and allow it to comfort you. Sign up to get my Strategies… nothing will bring her back, but they can help you find ways to make peace with her passing… big hug to you!
My dog(bubbles)❤ had recently died (snake bite).. & in don’t know how to get past it.. I’ll take one step , he’s right behind me. I’ll cross the lake , he’s right behind me. He was my fishing dog ❤ we did almost every outdoor sport together..nd I’m pretty sure I won’t ever get another dog like that , or have a stronger bond. I’ll defend him , and he will bite or “defeat” anything or anybody that will get near me. Now , I just miss him soo much and wasn’t expecting so much pain to come .
I’m so sorry!! Snake bite means unexpected and so hard to accept and get through. How to get past it is to quote what you just said, “take one step”, and believe and trust that he’s still right behind you, only this time it’s the spirit following you without the body attached. Does that make any sense to you? Our bodies are simply a vessel for our souls, and this pertains to dogs too. So Bubbles’ body is no longer with you, but his spirit is right there, as always. It can be soooo hard to see that or believe that when we are in a place of deep grief and loss, but ask him for a sign; ask him to let you know in a way that you cannot mistake for a sign that he is near. And then don’t watch for it, but simply be open and trust that the bond exists with or without a body. The love can never, ever die. Your sign will show up when you aren’t trying to hard, aren’t needing or begging, but rather when you are in a place of allowing life to give you what you need. ❤ and big hugs to you.
my golden lab had 2 white patches on her shoulders that looked like angel wings. i had to put her down today. it was so hard to say goodbye. i wish she was here right now and got better after surgery. her chances weren’t good. she was so popular everywhere i took her. she loved every person that saw her. she loved the water also. she was all i had and now i am utterly alone. when will the hurting stop? i can’t be in my house without her here. she was just a puppy and didn’t have a mean bone in her body. she never barked either. we sometimes shared the same pillow and she took up 90% of the bed the way she slept. she had to sleep against me, that was her favorite.
all she wanted was for me to be with her all the time. i loved her so much.
thank you for this website.
Oh Casey, I am so sorry. The bond we have with our dogs is so strong and so special; it’s unlike any other relationship and that makes it so hard to say goodbye. It’s important to grieve as long and as hard as you need to, but please also remember as often as you can how grateful you are to have had your sweet girl and your relationship as long as you did, for however long it was. When I can recognize that all the love and joy that my dog Ace brought me was worth the pain somehow it makes it just a little easier. Your girl is hanging around you … her spirit is very much alive and wanting to bring you peace now as much as she did when her body was with you. Close your eyes, focus on your heart and allow yourself to feel nothing but love for her… that is when you will feel her near, loving you as always.
Sam, I’m so sorry Rosie’s life had such a tragic and sudden end. I’m glad you found comfort in the words here. Please let me know if you need more support. Blessings to you!